My FET: Just the 2 of us..

 ** My theme song for this time would be "Somewhere Over the Rainbow". Do enjoy this song while you read thru the rest of this journey of mine ;)

	Israel Kamakawiwo'ole - Somewhere Over The Rainbow/What A Wonderful World .mp3
	Found at bee mp3 search engine

Dear frens..
Sorry for taking such a long time to update my blog.
Kinda looking for the right mood to finally update this blog
I presume that you could guess what was the result from my title above :)
Yes.. it was negative, again.
(and do accept my sincere apology for making some of you think that i'm preggy ;) )


Erm.. it has been almost 2 months after my FET ended. Pheww.. it took me such a long time to update this blog.
If i were to update  this blog right after i got the news.. i believe my blog would be full of
emotional writing, i guess..
So.. i decided to put a break first.. and continue with my blog after i'am not under such emotional state ...;)



Here's the flashback:

22 June - 3 July 2011
The 2 weeks waiting game is on.
As expected, i experienced more or less the same signs or should i say side effects as my previous attempt..
bloating, cramp, back pain and so on.
But this time it was slightly different. On my 2nd and 3rd day after the tranfer, watery fluid come out of my vagina.. it was something like the fluid that you get when you ovulated.
I was a bit panick, thinking that the fluid that was transferred into my vagina that contains the embryos has slipped out ! So i send an sms to tell the nurse on this.
She then returned my message saying that there's nothing to be worry about.. fuhhss... what a relief.
For the whole of the 2 WW.. i was really enjoying it.
My husband took a really good care of me..
Bought food, did the chores, massage me when i felt back pains.. ;)
what a lovely moments.. how i wish to be pampered like that for my whole life.. kekeke..

4 July 2011
The 2 WW has finally ended. It's time to do the pregnancy test..pheww
Can't really sleep the nite before.. I had such a very bad dream.. in my dream... i found out my pregnancy test was negative... huhuhu. i must have been thinking so much of the result that it appear in my dream..
Woke up at 6.30 am.. feeling uneasy.. worry that my bad dreams would come true.
Though my heart pounding fast, i put all my guts to do the pregnancy test..
After 1 minute.. 1 line visible..
3 minute.. still 1 line..
wait again.. 8 minutes.. huhhu.. 1 line..
15 minutes.. sighhhh.. 1 line.. ;(
Can't really believe my eyes.. i even tried to see the test strip under the bedroom light..
but.. nothing changed.. ;(


I slowly woke-up my husband and told him the news.
He looked a bit frustrated too .. ;(
I then lie back on the bed, next to him, closed my eyes and tried to swallow the truth...sigh


I stopped taking the Duphaston as per doctor's instruction.
I got my menstrual 5 days after that (actually i thought that i would still have the chance of being pregnant since my mentrual was delayed for few days ..sigh).. This time my menstrual pain last for almost 3 days.. huhu...


Since this is the second failed attempt, both of us handle it pretty well.
No tears.. no sorrow....just the feeling of bit of frustration on the first day.
Deep down inside, I believe there is still hope.. and God (Allah) must have a better and greater plan for both of us.


For those who will be doing their IVF/IUI.. who is on TTC..
though my IVF failed, i hope this blog will still give you inspiration to fight the journey
Whatever happens, don't you ever give up...
Remember that there are million of successful IVF stories out there in the whole world ;)


I guess.. that's the end of our first journey of IVF..
Insyaallah, when the right time comes, we will be doing another IVF.
At the moment, we will put a pause for the TTC. Let my uterus rest for a while ya ;)


A day after we received the not-so-good news.... we decided to have a break for
a romantic honeymoon at Tioman Island.. ;) Yeayyy..

    


Not our day.... yet  ;P